Welcome to my first report on Clan Recruitment. What is my goal? To get myself into a kickass clan of course. What other reason would I have to play Starcraft?

I started out in a few Brood War USA-{insert number here} channels. Since it was Saturday morning, I was having a hard time finding those "join our clan" bots and instead, kept getting spammed by "make lots of cash" bots. I was about to give up my quest due to lack of fun when suddenly a message flashed across the screen:

Come to channel DOV to join a kickass clan. We have great players, a great ratings system, and an awesome page. Come to the channel now to see if you've got the stuff to join us.

"Original Name," I said.
"Hehe," he replied.

I double-clicked his profile and saw that he was a 23 year old player with an 8-3 record. His profile was also blank. I went back into the channel.

"Can I try out for your clan?" I asked.
"Sure," Leader replied, "join dov/dov"

The map he had chosen for my test was Desert BGH. I began to download the map.

"You don't have this map?" he asked incredulously.
"Nope," I replied, "Let's play on Lost Temple."

He agreed and changed the map.

We both went random. I received Protoss at 12:00, he received Terran at 6:00.

Early Game:

I sent my first 9 dragoons down to his choke and immediately expanded to the 3:00 starting position. I maynarded 8 probes over cloning each one to a different mineral patch. I kept pumping probes out of both nexuses and shortly thereafter expanded to my mineral only expansion. In the meantime, I continued reinforcing the troops at his choke with goons and speed upgraded zealots out of the 4 gateways that I had at home.

Mid Game

I built a robo facility and then a shuttle, I loaded the shuttle up with a probe and a templar and sent them over to the top left island expansion. Then I started observers. I sent the first one to his island expansion. Turrets forced my observer to retreat. "Uh oh," I thought. My next observer went to his natural. I was shocked to find it empty. I didn't take my natural due to my fear of turbo newbies but with the ability to protect the 6:00 natural with tanks on the cliff, he had no excuse for not taking his.

I moved my observer a little closer to his base and on the cliff above his natural there were 6 turrets, 3 bunkers and 6 tanks. He was turtling! That's why I was surprised when my third observer went to the 9:00 starting spot and found a command center and 3 mining SCVs. Two bunkers were being built at the choke. I quickly sent 12 speed upgraded zealots. They ran by the bunkers and head straight for the command center. However, they took no hits from the bunkers because they were empty. He lifted off the command center and headed it back to his main. I left the observer patrolling the 9:00 main and natural.

Late Game:

My ground upgrades were now 3/3/2 and my air upgrades were 2/1. My troop count was 12 zealots, 12 dark templar, 24 dragoons, four corsairs with dweb, and 4 carriers.

I cloned the corsairs so that they covered the entire front of his cliff with dweb. Then I moved in the carriers and the ground troops. I levelled his base in approximate 1 minute losing 3 zealots. Then I sent the carriers over to the island and quickly demolished it.

After the game, we returned to the channel.

"Wow, you're awesome!" Leader~DOV~ said.
":-)" I replied.
"You can definitely join," he said.
"Wow, thanks!" I said.

Then I left the channel, never to return. I went to the clan website and posted a briefer version of this battlereport on their message forum. Then I went off in search of another clan.

To be continued...