"At home four zealots came wandering past my choke point, took one look at the wallin, asked T_Mac for danger pay, didn't get it, and contented themselves with scouting my natural and then going on strike for better wages. I think they might be still there, waving signs and chanting 'For Hire!'
Alright, so that pun sucked. Work with me here people. It's past midnight."
-Fractal_Wave
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| The Redemption | | | Author: | | | IP: | XXXX | | Date: | 12/04/99 09:12 | | Game Type: | Starcraft | | Labels: | none | | Report Rating: , # of Ratings: 1, Max: 7, Min: 7
Lifetime Rating for MRHD: 8.5455 |  | Part 1: Introduction
First of all, let me explain my apparent insanity that laced my earlier "reports"...upon my first visit to this site, I noticed a joke report, a one line thing that was obviously not meant to be taken seriously. I thought it was the most hilarious thing in the world, especially the comments that it generated. However, it appears now that I have pushed it a little too far, so here is something you would have never expected from me....a REAL report.
After waiting for a friend on Yahoo who never decides to show up, I get a sudden craving for another excursion inside of my virtual home, battlenet. On entering my clan channel, I am met with the disappoinment of realizing that none of my fellow clansmen are logged on at the moment. Normally I would head back now...but the desire to play is strong. I consider heading off to nohunters or x17 for a game....but then I decide to do something that the mere thought of would make many a player shudder. I clicked on the "Join" button.
After scrolling through the join game list, like a pioneer on the old frontier sifting through the overabundance of worthless rubble in vain hopes of finding precious gold, I at last come across "2v2 Artic Station". At this point I realize that, should I enter, I am commiting myself to whatever lunacy the general community decides to throw at me. I summon up all my courage, hope for the best, say a silent prayer, and enter.
I am the third one in. The first two are bodykiller1 and wussy-boy. The fourth, the proverbial "just one more", is ^Spoo^. His record is 0-0-1. Mine, on this alter ego of my real self (who shall not be revealed.) is 0-0-3. You could hear the savage grins of our opponents as their lips curled back, the saliva drenched edifices revealing canines that new the feast of blood would soon be their spoil. "gl hf" is thrown around in the meaningless form that it has now become, and the game begins.
Part 2: The Game
Being the bandwagoner that I am, I choose Protoss at the start. Wussy-Boy chose Zerg, while ^Spoo^ and bodykiller1 went random. I draw the upper-right start location, while my partner ^Spoo^ drew middle right, and when the blackness that shrouded his base clears by his clicking that magical "share vision" box, I see that he recieved Protoss as well. At this point I go my standard build for a map I don't know: Pylon on seven, gateway on eight, gateway on nine/scout with nine. My partner does a similiar build, with two gateways up at roughly the same time as me, and we both send a brave little probe out into the vast frigid wastes to discover the locales of our enemies. My probe engages in a frantic search- I found myself pressing nine (number probe was hotkeyed to.) time and again to send it on different paths. At long last it finds signs of activity by Orange Zerg, who is none other that wussy-boy, in the lower left corner. In a traumatic moment, as the brave little fellow scouts the perimeter of wussy-boy, a monstorous tentacle shoots out of the ground from beneath it, impaling the probe and sending it to the great big Nexus in the sky. My partner's probe scouts out green Protoss at middle left.....only, unlike me, he is able to save his probe so it may serve him another game.
By this time we had been scouted out as well. We decide to each gather zealots along with our first goons to attack green. When we arrive we find that quite a few cannons have warped in- nevertheless, like real soliders we press on. He had a fair number of zealots himself, and with the advantage of a shield battery he was able to keep us at bay long enough for his partner to send some hydraliske to assist him, and thus our attack fails. I am somewhat undecided about how to go about this, so rather than remain actionless, I instead expand twice, once to the upper left corner, and another into a resource node that my late probe found between me and my ally. My parnter now has four gateways and a core up, and has a fair number of goons and zealots. I am now more or less teching to reavers, and am at the time getting in that precious second reaver, hoping to unleash swift death to the mineral line of my unsuspecting Protoss opponent.
The only problem is that he was suspecting. As my shuttle makes its path across the map, a pack of roaming corsairs intercept it....unfortunantly, I had sent it to a designated location at my upper left expansion while I was working at producing corsairs of my own at base. I center in just in time for my heart to sink, for in an illuminous explosion the shuttle becomes another footnote in Starcraft history, along with the precious cargo within. At the same time, I notice red fireworks at the bottom right corner of the screen- my partners newly founded expansion. A team of mutalisks backed by corsairs and goons is laying waste to the area, and I send my still small fleet of corsairs to the aide of my ailing ally. He also sends his army of goons- together we beat back the attacking force, but not until the took out his Nexus. At this point I send in an observor to spy on Zerg....a spore colony takes it out of the picture, but not before I spot a mutating Spire. Now it is still too early in the normal course of a game to be so high on the tech tree, so I realize that wussy-boy must have powered to mutalisks, an assumption further affirmed by the fact that there are few other units around. Play time was over- it was time to kill.
I decided to go with a corsiar/dtemp combo, while my partner sent mass goons and a few zealots. We rushed the two spore colonies that were about the area, ensuring an easier passage for both my sairs and my dtemps, and then the sickening pop of the Overlord could be seen across the screen....he had a few hydralisks that tried to ward off my corsairs, but not warriors to be intimidated, my corsairs flew right over the heads of the hydralisks to get at an unusually rich clump of Overlords at the middle of the base. Living up to the name, wussy-boy leaves the game without so much as a word, despite the fact that we has so far only popped a few of his Overlords and removed his defense at the choke. I was ready to relax and breeze my way to another victory...until a rain of crimson light flooded the mini-map at my upper left expansion and my main.
When you realize that your partner is in trouble, you have two choices. Choice one is to commit yourself to the saving of this individual, to show true character and honor as to be an avatar of teamwork, in sending your own units, those which you worked so hard to obtain, to protect this person which random chance has paired you up against. Or, you can take one look at your partner's dilemma, murmur under your breath about their high incompetance level, and counter attack your opponents, leaving your ally to die a cold and brutal death. Bodykiller1 opted for the latter. A swarm of goons, dtemps, and sairs flooded my expansion, making short work of the high temps and cannons that I had place there. Back at my main, bolts of lightning littered the sky as my high templars desperately tried to fend of the layers of goons and dtemps that swarmed in. Desperately trying to move my sluggish reavers to the front lines, I threw everything but the kitchen sink (yes I know it is cliche.) at the oncoming forces....and at last the scarabs hit, and so much dragoon ooze seeped into the ground, amid the burning wastes that had once been the left side of my base. It was time for payback.
By intelligenc brought to me by an observor I realized that the frontline of my opponent was lined with cannnons with reavers close behind, and also it appeared that he might be going carriers. But, as his type invariably do, there was a weak spot in the northernmost corner of his base, the perfect spot for a drop...or even better, a recall. Having already warped in an Arbiter Tribunal for just such an opportunity, I quickly ordered up two arbiters and researched recall. Discussing strategy with my partner, he agreed to assault the front head-on to serve as a distraction so that I could get my recall in without problem. So as he sent goons, zealots, and archons at bodykiller1's choke, I sent my arbiter with a corsair escort to land at the sweet spot in the north. A horde of reavers, goons, zealots, and archons, along with an observor, sat clumped up in my base, ready for the decisive operation.
Everything worked just as expected. Bodykiller1 drew all his forces to the front line to meet the attack of ^Spoo^, while I snuck in around back, and recalled enough troops that they instantly leveled the buildings around them. A fleet of corsairs quickly showed up to destroy my arbiter, and when the hidden contents below were revealed, bodykiller1 knew all was lost, issued the standard "gg", and then left. (Final scores are below.)
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