"clicking on a ::nobody:: report will subject you to Smithsonian caliber pictures"
-::nobody::
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| Fatboy gets his fat ass kicked | | | Author: | | | IP: | 1Cust175XXXX | | Date: | 03/17/00 10:03 | | Game Type: | Starcraft | | Labels: | none | | Report Rating: , # of Ratings: 1, Max: 6, Min: 6
Lifetime Rating for {DD}Fatboy: 4.3571 |  | This game started after a stressing session of piano (araghhh my piano teacher smells like salmon (or semen for that matter) baked in the sun for a week). I was looking for a nice relaxing game of Starcraft so I started spamming nohunters for a 1v1 until Kwik replied. The game was made and we both got ready to duke it out on the no longer lost temple.
Map: The Lost Temple
Players: {DD}Fatboy, randomed Terran to 12:00 vs Kwik, chosen Protoss to 6:00
Hm... 12:00 terran vs 6:00 toss? Looks like I was screwed. To keep my manhood (or boyhood), I decided to just play it out, since it was UMS anyways. Anyways, my BO(not to be confused with body odor) looked like this:
8:depot
10:barracks
11:depot (completing the wall-in)
14:gas
15:core
I knew that if I wanted to win this, I would need to imitate heartcutter in every way that I could. Using his heavy metel build, I decided to test how good tanks really were against protoss. Nothing happened for awhile, we were both teching, I went 3 factories for vultures and tanks. When I had 6 vultures (with mines) and 6 tanks (with seige mode, duh) I sent them to the protoss and hoped for the best...
Right after leaving my choke single file, my troops ran smack dab into a bunch of Kwik's goons. Now 6 tanks and 6 vultures can easily kill 6 goons, but not if they're going single file down a ramp. I ended up losing 2 vultures and a tank before seiging up and scaring the goons away. During this, 3 tanks popped online and I added them to my crew, bringing me up to 8 tanks and 4 vultures. I ventured carefully this time, slowly leapfroging from my base to the center.
In the center, out forces collided again, his 10 or so goons meeting with my 8 tanks and 4 vultures. After pimping his goons while only losing a couple of tanks, one of my tanks suddenly blew up! Muttering various obseneities, I relized I had been the victim of a dark templar rush. Cursing, I relized I didn't even have a acadamy yet, so I had to rely on spider mines for detection. Having my tanks stall the dark templar, I raced my vultures to the choke and laid some mines there. Retreating them and the 2 tanks I had left up my ramp, I quicjly started an acadamy and que'ed up some vultures.
As my tanks seiged up and waited for the impending doom, a few zealots charged in and absorbed my spider mines! Then came the dark templars, and with absolutly no detection, I was about ready to give up. Right then however, 3 vultures popped up and started laying mines. At this point, if Kwik had sent his darkie to my scv line, I was geniunly screwed. I didn't dare lay mines there, because one mine would blow up a shitload of scvs. Fortunetly for me, Kwik decided to chase my tanks and allowed himself to be lured into 2 mines, ending the dark templar threat.
As we approched mid-game, I expanded to top left and started a starport. I then took my growing army (12 tanks) and started moving toward the center. Once again, we met in the center, and once again, my tanks made goon soup out his troops. However, right when the last goon fell, I was reduced to 5 wounded tanks just as a storm fell perfectly on my tanks, destroying them all. Swearing in every language I knew how, I que'ed up some more tanks and added a factory and a command center at my natrual When my expansion was started to come online, a single zealot was dropped and killed ALL my scvs. I sent my lone wraith to try and kill it, but once I stripped its sheild's off, a pack of hungry scouts (haven't seen those in a while) ripped it to shreds, as well as my command center. Quickly changing production from tanks to goliaths, I also threw up an armory for valks.
Not a moment too soon, a pack of 8 scouts sailed into my natrual. I had 6 gollies at this point, but Kwik pulled off some fancy micro and picked off 3, losing only a single scout. This forced me to resort to desperate measures. I pulled 12 scvs off mining and had them tag along with my gollies. When the first goliath fired off 2 hellfire missles, the scouts swerved and starting blasting away at it. At this moment, I used my 12 scvs to repair their little fusion cutters off. I suceeded in driving him away, and I continued mining at my natrual. Scanning top right, I noticed his scouts were hanging around there. I started cooking up an idea in the walbut sized brain of mine.
I dropped off 4 goliaths on my ledge, with another 4 supporting them from below. The scouts dived right into the action, only to be raped by goliaths, and turned tail and ran (flew?) right into a pack marines/valkyries. I lost one goliath and killed over 8 scouts. At this point, I sent marines to every expansion, to notice that almost all the expansions were his! I had one expansion, while he had around 6. Hm... I decided to make one more attack, sending tanks, vultures, firebats, and goliaths at one of his expansions.(9:00 natrual) This worked suprisingly well, taking the down the natrual and managing to wreck some havoc on the main before I saw 2 shiny flying objects enter my main. As these two shining objects began creating warp feilds in my base, I knew I was doomed. 4 goons, 2 reaveres, and 4 carries were warped in. My defence? 2 tanks, a goliath, and a firebat. Calling GG, I conceded to Kwik and congradulated him.
Lessons Learned
1.Terran will beat toss if resources are equal, but not if the toss outresources him 6:1 :)
2. Kwik should have sent his first dark templar into my scv line immediatly, but it turned out it didn't matter, I got owned anyways.
3. I finally learned to use HTML, so hopefully this report gets a 3+.
4. My terran sucks goat penis.
5. I should've made some defence in my top left expansion, at least enough to stop 1 zealot.
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