And today is yet another day of bread-and-butter image-and-writing-battle-reports...and right after Testosterone's Flash br (which blew my mind more than Britney Spears). But maybe you'll like this one; real players today. ^_^
I obsed a few games, with the intent of br-ing, but it turned out that all of them ended way too anti-climatically...rush, counter-rush, exchange of "ggs" and then it was over. During the first of those games, Loser gave me a quick br-tour and I got a few basics down.
"Rommel, your next br better be good, or you'll get flames from me."
Yes, sir.
I hung around ~nohunters for about half an hour...Incandescance and a few of his friends were like 2v2-ing every freakin' minute it seemed, and after a few tries, the game was started successfully and ~nohunters was basically filled with quiet chatting here and there. I met badtz-maru, attempted to talk to each other in Korean, and Corbalt and a few other guys came in. We chatted a bit.
Eventually, Incadescance came back in, and he was going 1v1 with PitRanger. I immediately asked if I could br.
"Sure Rommel."
And the game started.
The first three games were about the same as my other ones; short, anti-climatic battles marking the end of the game. But on the fourth game, I had a good, fifty-minute long game on my hands with which I could shape and mold into my own stylized br.
PitRanger and Incandescance both randomed, with Incandescance warping in as brown Protoss at the 6:00 main, and PitRanger as blue Protoss rifting forth at the 3:00 position. Both were big, ugly, and evil, and in the preliminary Probe-building process, I pissed in my pants because I suddenly remembered that I hadn't emptied out my StarCraft folder which had 85 pics of previous games.
I managed to get everything good and ready before they placed their Pylons down, and soon, their build-orders were revealed to me as they prepared for a taxing war over the bloodied grounds of the Lost Temple (PitRanger had fought good, hard games against Incadescance, and had lost them all). Incadescance began with a traditional Protoss build, with a Pylon at 7, Gate at 9, and a second Gateway at 11, followed by a Pylon at 12. Zealots started rifting in as the Gateways came online. PitRanger went for early gas, with the intent of teching quickly to whatever he had in mind; 7 Pylon, 9 Gateway, 10 Gas.
Ojiminusakii, the Scouting Probe, was sent by Incandescance immediately in a counter-clockwise path, finding PitRanger's 9:00 main, then dying shortly after as PitRanger's first Zealot attacked it savagely. It relayed its reconnaissance photos back to Incandescance just before it was destroyed, however, and Incandescance discoverededed a second gateway just warping in, with a Cybernetics Core following shortly after. He set up his own Assimilator in preparation for goons.
At this point, Incandescance had three Zealots; with one already at PitRanger's choke, and two more heading towards that location. PitRanger had a total of four Zealots when the battle started; a revelation most unwanted for Incandescance. For some reason, PitRanger's Zealots weren't rallied at his choke, so Incandescance charged forward into the battle. The odds were against him; they would stay against him, as he would attempt to draw two of PitRanger's Zealots away from the battle, but failed miserably; two Zealots engaged four in a one-sided battle. The third Zealot circled around and attacked the left flank of the four-Zealot formation, but it was too late. One of Incandescance's Zealots died, and for a moment, the Zealots continued to tear through each other's Plasma Shields...then Inca's will broke, and he began the tedious process of what I will term here as, "hauling ass." Inca decided it was time to scout out PitRanger's tech, and his Zealots jogged at a leisurely pace farther up into PitRanger's main, finding an Assimilator, and a completed Cy. Core. They turned, ran, and the rear-most Zealot was caught; he died as he attempted to march to the west. The second Zealot managed to juke and jive through PitRanger's troops, but just as it seemed that he would be escaping without serious damage, two goons popped out of PitRanger's Gateways and began to lay down a withering barrage of fire. The Zealot went into "High-Gear Haul-Ass," and by the time it had left PitRanger's choke, was "in the red." Results of the battle; Incandescance is three less two Zealots, to PitRanger's loss of none. At home, Incadescance has a Cy. Core warping in. He has no Forge, so Cannons aren't going to work; only two Gateways; no Robo. Fac. so he can't get Reavers. Their bases are at 6:00 and 3:00...PitRanger's forces will be knocking on his door in just a minute. What will happen?
Well, first, PitRanger gathers his troops and sends them in hot pursuit against Inca's single Zealot. He then begins warping in a StarGate (!).
Incandescance busts out with the best retreat skills that I have seen in my entire life; it's reminiscent to the British evacuation of Dunkirk, without boats. Actually, not really, I'm just doing this so that the text and pictures will fill out nicely. But the Zealot does manage to stay out of range of the goons and Zealots; if Inca had just two goons and another Zealot, he'd be able to delay the force very well by picking off the front row of Zealots, or even sacrificing the Zealots to stall PitRanger's Zealots so that Inca's goons could engage the former's ranged attackers. That would have made for some good micro ss. But alas, I was fated to walk home empty-handed.
By the time PitRanger's troops have gathered outside of Incandescance's natural, Inca has raised a force of four Zealots. PitRanger's army consists of two goons and four Zealots.
Junoyusuji the Zealot was tense; his uncanny ability to hear the clunking of a goon was...uncanny. Then, there was movement just beyond the mineral fields; shadows? No; the enemy. The air was split apart by an intense light as the first bursts were fired by the goons, and Junoyusuji led his fellow Zealots into battle, only to be stopped short by the same number of enemy Zealots. There was a piercing cry on both sides, and then Psi Blades began to crash into the flickering lights of psionic defense fields. Goon fire was ripping hard into Junoyusuji's squad, but he rallied them forward, deeper into the battle. One of Junoyusuji's men fell, disintegrated by the intense anti-matter bursts of the goon cannons. Psi Blades continued to tear against weakening Plasma Shields, and the wear on Junoyusuji's troops was beginning to show. They were demoralized, knowing that no matter how hard they fought, the battle was lost. They fought anyway, slowly dying against a numerically superior foe. Junoyusuji, fighting on the right flank, felt the burning thrust of a Psi Blade hit him deep in his chest, piercing his heart. He faltered, fell, died, releasing his psionic essence from his physical body to become one with the presence of the Khalai. Two more Zealots left; they roared their battle cry, and fought on; but as a third Zealot fell, the last began his retreat, all the while taking goon fire as he retreated up Inca's ramp. PitRanger's Zealots clambered up the choke, taking fire from a single goon and running into two Zealots shortly after, quickly reduce to one. Inca ordered the retreat, but one Zealot stayed behind to buy time for Inca's goon. His sacrifice in vain, because as the goon stopped to fire, the Zealots and goons tore it down quickly. Soon, PitRanger's troops were pounding on Inca's Gateways, and goons warping out of them were quickly dispatched. But Inca had no intention of going down quickly; Probes began to appear from the mineral fields, some with chunks of ore and crystal still levitating on magnetic charges. The Probes rushed forward under the covering fire of two of Inca's goons, destroying first one enemy goon, then the other with little loss. The bloody battle had ended.
But as two more goons warped in from Inca's Gateways, he gathered his troops for a counter-attack, hoping to catch his opponent off-guard.
Inca's aggressiveness impressed me; he seemed to be sure of himself and his abilities, unlike PitRanger, who was more cautious. Four goons were advancing forward, prepared to engage in whatever battle they found. They entered the 3:00; no expansion. No cannon fire from the cliffs, either. A moment later, the goons were creeping up the ramp, and then tearing across the level ground towards PitRanger's main. Three goons and eight Zealots were waiting for them; for a moment, Inca engaged the goons.
The odds were against them, but the mechanized warriors were confident in their ability to dance their machines around the Zealots and fire at the enemy goons; but the worst possible event happened. A cannon warped in. In mere seconds, the attack was quickly broken up by Photon Cannon bursts. Two crashed into the easternmost goon, damaging it badly, and the goon fire crippled it as the four-goon contingent retreated from the battle. It was a bad decision on Inca's part, but it displayed a good characteristic; willingness to take risks and attack, instead of sitting back at home waiting for the next assault. I now bestow the title, "Half-a-Rommel" upon Incandescance.
Shortly after the battle, both players began to rebuild and tech. There had been no serious blow to Inca's army, but he would have to macro pretty hard to catch up to PitRanger in terms of numbers. Inca had six goons in his army, compared to PitRanger's five goons and eight Zealots.
The tech at this point was very divergent. Brown set up a vortex for a Templar Archives, and blue laid down a second StarGate and Fleet Beacon. What was I expecting? Well, not many toss players lay down dual StarGates against another toss, so I didn't know what to expect. It was easy to see what blue was going for, however; DTs to contain blue, who had no cannons at his ramp and no expansions and no Observers. After that, a tech to High Templar and Storm (which will be a very good choice).
Blue, however, begins to lay down a screen of cannons at his ramp. He also sets up a few cannon batteries at his minerals to guard against a Reaver Drop.
While PitRanger is on defense for a bit, however, Inca decides to expand at his natural. A wise choice, because #1) Expanding is good and #2) Expanding is good. Add to that the fact that expanding is good, and you start to realize...expanding is, indeed, good. He also sets up twin Pylons in preparation for...not Cannons, obviously, since Incandescance doesn't have a fux0ring Forge.
For a moment, things are actually quiet. Both sides begin to mass their armies, and Brown is busy tinkering with his expansion. But then, something is revealed to me...PitRanger's dual StarGates and Fleet Beacon was for production of Carriers. He has also laid down a Robotics Facility to produce an Observer.
At this point, Inca's Dark Templar has charged into PitRanger's main and ends up being nearly owned by Cannons, goons, and Zealots and hauls ass to the 12:00 main. A second Dark Templar, however, is waiting at his natural; laying in wait to deny an expansion (and give me a chance to insert the cliche "Expansion: DENIED" pic). PitRanger, however, has no intent of being cannoned in and brings an Observer over to his ramp. He spots a Dark Templar, sends his entire army to attack it, and begins construction of his expansion.
I was shocked. My virgin eyes were soiled and raped. I screamed bloody murder. I then proceeded to take ss of blue's expansion. Then, I realized that Inca was doing something naughty. He was expanding at the 9:00 position without sending any defensive units. My virgin eyes were again soiled and I could feel the dark presence of "powering-like-a-whore" creep upon me.
Incandescance decided that now was a good time to attack PitRanger. He gathered his formidable army of goons, DT, Zealots, and Templar and advanced towards the 3:00 position. Almost immediately, Photon Cannons began to pour down merciless fire down the cliff, pounding into several hapless goons and destroying them as they attempted to step out of range. The advance continued, however, and the remaining goons engaged a few Zealots as they neared the ramps. Inca seemed to hesitate; the ramp was before him, he outnumbered the defenders, and he had Storm. His chances of defeating PitRanger at this point were slim...oh, that's right, there's an expansion begging to be raped. Just barely managing to turn his troops about before engaging in a costly battle at PitRanger's choke, Inca sends a DT over to the newly-warped Nexus and began to hack away at it. PitRanger cancels the expansion, however, and Inca begins the tedious process of hauling-ass out of the natural while taking fire from the Cannons on the cliff. He retreats successfully, while taking only a total of six goons and two Zealots lost. PitRanger lost three Zealots and an expansion attempt. Tactically, the battle goes to PitRanger, but strategically, Incandescance is in the lead.
Things are quiet, but after a moment of silence, I see a blue dot on the mini-map; a Shuttle. "Oooooh," I think, "Finally, a Reaver Drop."
The drop started as an assault on Inca's main; it ran into some Cannons, however, and turned to the 9:00 main. For a moment I thought that PitRanger would be able to take out the expansion, it being protected by a pair of Cannons and nothing else...but I was badly mistaken. OMG I haven't seen anything die that fast since Zelda. That, ladies and gentlemen, was the only drop in the entire game. Let's give PitRanger a hand, everybody. Also, I wondered why PitRanger didn't mount an attack on that 9:00 expansion after seeing its light defenses. Then I realized, "That's right, PitRanger just wants to get Inca's confidence up, then deal a morale-crushing blow just as it seems that Inca has got the game in the bag."
As you can see in the picture above, things are not looking good for PitRanger, whose cautiousness and two StarGates are slowly killing him. Incandescance Maynards his Probes over to the 9:00 main, and also begins an expansion at its natural. I do not have a pic on the grounds that I have too many pics of expansions and those get annoying anyway.
PitRanger, after expanding at his natural and establishing a decent defense, heads over to the 12:00 natural and expands there...only to have his Probe and Nexus razed by the wounded Dark Templar that Inca had left at the 12:00 main after its unsuccessfuly foray into PitRanger's main.
But what's this? A Shuttle at PitRanger's natural? And it's brown, no less. It takes two shots from a Cannon, then unloads two Templar onto the cliff of PitRanger's main.
Mulan the Warrior Probe attempts to battle the others for female rights. She wants the right to vote, just like men. Unfortunately, her wish is not granted and she is forced to star in a gay Disney movie. The others laugh at her and begin to mine away, because that is how peons wack off. Suddenly, there is a crackling of psionic energy in the air; the Probes feel a slight tug, then they are ripped apart by the fury of the Templar, shredded into tiny pieces of metal and wire, exploding and burning as pieces of their cute, cuddly, somewhat dildo-like bodies fall to the ground and bounce once, twice. Incandescance is laughing his ass off at the amount of death that his Templar drop has brung -- he is impervious to the little Probe children that he has just made fatherless.
And then, Pit Ranger makes his counter-stroke; he drops two Zealots and a goon on his cliff, killing the Templar with savagery equal to the inhumanity the Templar displayed at their cold-blooded slaughter.
PitRanger then expands again at the 12:00 natural. He also drops two Zealots and a Dragoon at the 5:00 island, where Incandescance had an Observer watching him.
Incandescance sends his army of goons, Templar, and Dark Archons with Mind-Control upgraded to 12:00's natural, where had an Observer observing PitRanger's expansion. I would like to point out that upgrades are 1-0-1 compared to PitRanger's 0-0-1, in case you're a total dumb-ass that can't see that in the picture. And, from the picture above this one, you can also probably see that PitRanger's troops are quite outnumbered, with no mass-killers at all, so any qualitative advantage that a toss player could have up his sleeve is basically gone. His Carriers are 0-0-8. Things look grim.
In the last few moments of the Battle for the Lost Temple, Inca's massive army of goons and support units can be seen marching directly towards the 12:00 natural. As the first few goons begin to pound on the expansion, PitRanger chooses this moment to send his fleet of Carriers into battle. There is a scream of engines as Interceptor squadrons are released, and then the soft, thundering booms of battle can be heard from afar. Flashes of light momentarily light up the night sky, and are followed by brilliant fire-cracker explosions of goon and Interceptor. For a moment, just a brief moment, the forces are in equilibrium; a few goons die, a few Interceptors go down. And then, a slight tremor in the psychic essence of the plain is disturbed. A moment later, the rippling in the sky stops; and two of PitRanger's Carriers are now opening fire into their own ranks. This is followed by the all-too familiar sounds of the fury of Psi Storm, and one-by-one, the Carriers and their Interceptors are slowly damaged, crippled, and destroyed. It is not the steady barrage from the goons that wins the battle, nor the two turn-coat Carriers; it is the sheer power of Psi Storm that carries the day, and this in turn begins to show as PitRanger's Carrier fleet is slowly whittled down to a single ship.
Moments later, the comparitively small ground army of PitRanger charges forth from his mineral-only, and the ensuing skirmish is enough to set one's teeth on edge as savage close-in fighting erupts. Zealots rush forward quickly, negating and preventing Inca to release his barrage of Psi Storms that would have surely erupted if his own units hadn't gotten in the way. Two of Inca's goons fall, utterly ripped apart and discarded like unwanted toys; but the numerically and qualitatively superior forces of Incandescance crashes into the few remaining blue-ornamented Protoss troops. They are smashed and grinded into the ground as Inca makes a dash to the wire, a swift attack on PitRanger's main.
I will leave these images of violence and valor without words.
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