"I have to admit I don't know a whole lot about this guy, cept that I obsed a few games with him, in which he's been suspiciously quiet. He seems to be very gm - perhaps a little overly so - and actually destroyed his scvs, floating his CC away over the nearest sea. Meanwhile I opted to scv dance round the closest geyser."
-|]agomar
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| Ultralisks can't Fly | | | Author: | | | IP: | cs16778-XXXX | | Date: | 01/16/01 03:01 | | Game Type: | Starcraft | | Labels: | none | | Report Rating: , # of Ratings: 1, Max: 5, Min: 5
Lifetime Rating for Shitty-Peon: 4.5000 |  | I've always been known for stupidity during starcraft games. The things people rule out due to common sense are the things that I do gain me losses. Like expanding to my enemies natural, it COULD of been real clever if I knew my enemy was there. Well this one fateful day I think I met my match for starcraft stupidity in a Nohunters player named BUU.
As destiny would have it we ended up squaring off on Lost Temple (where else?) to show something for our endless amount of trash talk. The match was, I must say, the stupidest, shittiest and most hilarious match I've ever had.
Map: Lost Temple
We both randomed off and nothing happened in the first 5-10 min or so, as I think we were making fun of something (if not each other). I drew Yellow Zerg at 12:00. I sent my overlord to 3:00 and then sent my 2nd to 9:00 where I spotted him as Brown Protoss. I'm a terrible scout and have an attention span of nil, so I don't think I drew any profound conclusions for this scouting that might of helped me in the game.
I put down a 2nd hatch at my natural, and threw up an Extractor, spawning pool came next then quickly a lair. I kinda, sorta thought maybe lurkers or mutas or I don't know I just kind of do things like I said earlier. BUU's probe came in and saw a spire and queen's nest in the works. Luckily though he was as bad a scout as me as he totally missed my expansion at my natural.
Soon enough his zealots come rolling in, only about 5-6, but since I didn't take any time to put up sunkens or make any zerglings they went to work. I was forced to cancel my spire right before it finished, so I got my money back, and after a few minutes I successfully fended them off without too much loss.
Now I figured he was sure I was going hard mutas so I needed a change of strat to throw him off guard. I expanded to 3:00 and laid down about 8 hatcheries there. I went Hive, skipping spire entirely, my plan was set. I pumped overloards hardcore like trailer-trash pumped illegitimate children until I had 30/200 supply. At this point BUU starts notifying me of my imminent demise, unfortunately he had no idea what was coming to him.
15 fully upgraded Ultralisks pop out of my 3:00 expansion and high tail it to 9:00 for some serious ass-raping action. I don't remember much of this part of the game mainly because his base was gone in 3 seconds, and I was laughing my ass off so hard.
Unfortunately though, as my plan was hatching so was his. He had a fleet of maybe 3-4 scouts, 3 Carriers, and 20-25 CORSAIRS!!!
Unfortunately though we realized soon was that corsairs don't shoot ultralisks, and ultralisks don't hit corsairs. So we kind of sat there while we waited for his carriers to go across the map and kill stuff. At this point I assume he's on an island expansion so I threw a fit and watched BUU kill my 18 Ultralisks (which took about 25 minutes btw). My ultras were so ticked at this point that they couldn't hit crap in the air that they attacked they're home and master in fits of rage :( When I was down to about 3 ultralisks I noticed a pylon I missed over by his expansion. OMGWTFGAY! To my dismay this was not his last structure, but I soon found more pylons at the 2nd 6:00 natural.
The ending was the most climatic anti-climax I guess you could say. As I basically just cried that he was sitting on the bottom-right island with a pylon while his 3 carriers and 21 Corsairs killed everything in site.
I must say this was the most interesting 1v1 I've ever had. There's nothing better than seeing 10 corsairs hovering over 10 ultralisks and wondering wtf is going on?
Here's some screenshots :(
This is probably a bad battle report, but I'm not going for points, I just enjoyed the game so much that I thought I'd share it with people who have nothing better to do.
gg
| | Battle Shots! | 
Gosu air squadron prepared for massive mutas...
Ultralisks dying slowly to 3 carriers. In the 30 min break we had here we calculated that it would take about 600 from an interceptor to kill each ultra.
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