By Drefsab
The following is an article posted by a firm believer in Starcraft Creationism. I've seen many similar posts all over the Internet, but until today, I have never seen one as complete as this one. It was like a breath of fresh air and I hope each person that reads this will carefully consider its content and make the right choice for eternal happiness.

Author: Tim Subject: Creation Really Happened! Date: 6/5/01 19:07:32 Host: Spider.Proxy.AOL.com STARCRAFT CREATIONISM: After intense study and prayer, I've come to the conclusion that the only logical explanation for the origins of the game of Starcraft is an all-powerful, all-knowing, benevolent being who, approximately 30 days ago, presided over a 7 day creation week. We all know that the Holy Torahcraft states very clearly what was created on each day of the creation week. 1st Day - The Races (Terran, Protoss, and Zerg) 2nd Day - The Maps 3rd Day - Balance 4th Day - User Interface 5th Day - The Replay Feature 6th Day - Battle.net 7th Day - Our Lord Rested It is important to understand that our Lord presented us with a perfect game on the 6th day. The game was impeccably balanced and included every feature that any Starcraft player could ever dream of. Unforutnately, even though the Torahcraft is very specific on what was created and when, there are still many people who claim that the game of Starcraft has actually been around for 5-6 years. These "Patcholutionists" as they choose to call themselves are a scourge to the Starcraft community because they trivialize the gift that our benevolent Lord has bestowed upon us. In order to discredit the prepostorous claims of these Patcholutionists (and thus prove that the only logical alternative is Starcraft Creationism), we must first look closely at their beliefs so that we can understand what we are dealing with. THE BASICS OF PATCHOLUTIONISM: Proponents of Patcholution divide the supposed years of Starcraft's existence into Ages. They include: The Alpha Era The Beta Era The Vanilla Era The Broodwar Era The Replay Era (current) The Patcholutionist would have you believe that the game of Starcraft has arrived at its current state through random mutations called "patches". These "patches" have supposedly taken the game from its original state, to an increasingly balanced and playable game. The Patcholutionist will cite evidences to prove his theories. These evidences include such things as fossil records of previous patches located on certain Starcraft players' hard drives, screenshots from the Alpha and Beta eras, and the copyright date on the Starcraft CD. Now that we have a basic understanding of the beliefs of the Patcholutionist, lets go through some of their evidence and see how solid it really is. DISPROVING PATCHOLUTIONIST EVIDENCES: Let's talk about the fossil records first. Many Patcholutionists claim to have older patches from the Broodwar and the Vanilla era. They have even posted some of these patches up on websites so that people in the Starcraft community can download the evidence and obseve it for themselves. I admit that, in a moment of weakness, I downloaded these patches to see for myself whether the claims of the Patcholutionist were true. But even though I lacked blind faith, the Lord still helped me to see through the tricks of the devil. You see, when I downloaded these patches and tried to use them, they worked in the single player mode. However, no matter how hard I tried, I was unable to log onto Battle.net and play using these patches. That was when I realized that these patches were simply tricks of Satan. Our Lord would allow Satan to create these deceptions of an "imperfect" Starcraft game, but He wouldn't allow these deceptions to pollute the Battle.net paradise that He so lovingly created. Because I studied the Holy Torahcraft, I was able to see through this deception. Moving on to the screenshots from the Alpha era and the Beta era, I must say that this is probably the weakest evidence that the Patcholutionist has to offer. A lot of the units exhibited in these screenshots resemble computer games like Warcraft, Space Invaders, and Pong. Any logical person can see that these screenshots are not even close to being solid evidence. In fact, I would boldly state that these screenshots are also tricks of Satan. Finally, let's talk about the copyright date on the Starcraft CD. I've had many Patcholutionists throw this evidence at me as a desparate last resort when I had disproven all of their other arguments. They say, "Tim, for God's sake look at the CD man. It says right on the cover 'copyright 1997'!!" After scolding the Patcholutionist for taking the Lord's name in vain, I always laugh at him when he tries to use this evidence on me when the answer is so obvious. Most people think that when they see copyright 1997 that it means the year 1997, but if you look closely at the number, you can just barely see the colon between 19 and 97. That copyright actually denotes the time of day that the CDs were created. 19:97 is military time for 7:97 PM. Besides, why would the Lord need to put a copyright year on the CD when the game was created just 30 short days ago? So as you can see, the evidence for Patcholutionism is weak at best. When you carefully examine the evidence, it doesn't even come close to being able to stand on its own two feet. OTHER PATCHOLUTIONIST WEAK POINTS: Explaining away Patcholutionist evidence isn't enough though. We must also take a look at Patcholutionism as a theory and explore the logical holes within its very core. Take, for example, the fact that the theory of Patcholutionism directly conflicts with the 2nd law of thermodynamics. This law states that any closed system will deteriorate and decay over time. This is a scientific law. How then is it logical for a Patcholutionist to claim that, instead of decaying, the game of Starcraft has improved greatly since the Alpha era? Another example of logical inconsistency in the Patcholutionist theory is the population of Battle.net. The average number of users on Battle.net is approximately 100,000 at any given time. This average is up from 75,000 just two weeks ago. This is a 20% growth rate. If Starcraft was really 6 years old, even if Battle.net only had 10 users at its start (which is a generous assumption), at a 20% growth rate every two weeks, the Battle.net population would now be in the tens of billions which is more than the population of the entire world!!! Unless you believe in aliens playing Starcraft, its obvious to see that this is a serious flaw in the Patcholutionist theory. Finally, if God didn't create Starcraft, where did Starcraft come from? It seems illogical to assume that Starcraft just suddenly popped onto store shelves of its own accord. Yet Patcholutionists do not offer any alternative suggestions. Could it be because they don't have any? There are many, many other flaws similar to these mentioned that I won't go into for brevity's sake. However, just these three alone should be an indication at how flawed the Patcholutionary theory is. As you can see, belief in Patcholution is pure eccentricity! THE LOGIC OF STARCRAFT CREATIONISM: Now that I have shown that Patcholution is a totally debunk theory, its pointless to state evidences for Starcraft Creationism since its the only other logical choice. However, there are a few points to cover that can help a doubting soul who has made it this far into the article, yet still has doubts. So lets talk about God. Simple logic will tell you that an all-powerful, all-knowing, benevolent God exists. Let me quote the book of Templar Chapter 27 Verse 15 from the Torahcraft. It states, "I can believe in God through blind faith which strengthens me." The simplicity of this text is so beautiful. God gave us a powerful mind. Using this mind, we can truly make ourselves believe in anything that we want to. This power is what allows each human being to have their own unique perspective on what God wants and expects from his children. Thus, through our minds, we know that God exists. Since we know that God is benevolent, all-knowing, and all-powerful, it would be silly for us to believe that God would give us an incomplete or imbalanced game. Why would God give us a game where mutas built quickly, had great speed, and gave the Zerg map control in almost every matchup? If he was all-knowing and benevolent, he would know that this wouldn't be fun for players and he would take action to prevent it. The same is true for the replay option. God is all-knowing and he would know that the game of Starcraft would not be complete without a replay option. And so, it seems illogical to deny Starcraft Creationism. As I read down through this article, I am more convinced than ever that this truth is unavoidable to the truly openminded individual. Please take time to prayerfully consider what I've posted here today. Denying these truths could land you in the lake of fire at the time of the apocalypse. Be of good cheer and have blind faith in our Lord Jesus Christ. Sincerely, Tim