"A Server split just as I was about to enter a YRM game and into history..."
-[MrFurious]
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| Nafarias Sez#3: Battle In The Badlands (TFC Game) | | | Author: | | | IP: | 63.117.2XXXX | | Date: | 06/21/01 08:06 | | Game Type: | Other | | Labels: | none | | Report Rating: , # of Ratings: 1, Max: 8, Min: 8
Lifetime Rating for Nafarias: 6.8889 |  | |
Ladies and Gents - revel and delight in the TFC Battlereport "Nafarias Sez!" #3!
The world turns on its axis three-hundred and sixty-four times during one sidereal revolution around the flaming ball of plasmatic hydrogen and helium which mortal men call the Sun. During its fateful journey, countless events both great and small transpire, and men pursue the things they desire whether they be evil or no. However, among all these innumerable deeds there are few things - a rare and wonderful few - of which it can truly be said that they impact every person upon the terrestrial sphere where we all dwell.
This is not one of those things...
Ladies and gentlemen - boys and girls - children of all ages! I present to you...
Or - as the game actually turned out... LLAMAS IN PAJAMAS!
Okay folks - time for yet another adventure into the scary, scary world of public server matches in Valve Software's mod for Half-Life - Team Fortress Classic (TFC fer those in the know). TFC recently acquired new player models and some other fixes, so it looks a bit snappier than it used to. It is still impossible to FIND a good server - but at least it LOOKS better when you get there...
But where was this magnum opus to take place? Well, my job was made simple thanks to a POLL in the forums at Planetfortress.com. It was decided by the great unwashed of the forums that Nafarias Sez! #3 was to take place in the Valve map - BADLANDS. This is a great map - but it is VERY complex. Strap yourselves in, place your head between your knees and get ready to kiss your aaahhh - heh heh - get ready for an explanation of how Badlands works...
This is an overhead view of the map I took using the handy-dandy observer mode. Badlands is a regular 'capture the flag' style map that has two identical bases on opposite sides of a symmetical map. Red and Blue players battle to try and take the flag from the enemy base and bring it back to a cap point in thier base for 10 points. The team with the most points at the end of the match wins the game of course!
You will notice there is a big "S" shaped canyon between the bases. Badlands is unusual in that it has quite a large 'no man's land' between opposing teams. If you die on a flag run, it can take a bit of time before you can get back in place, especially if you are heavy Offense. But enough about that rot - what about the bases themselves?
The map has two 'levels' essentially. One level is the upper level where the main base is, and the other level is the 'canyon floor'. Each base has a main entrance and a side entrance on the upper level of the map, and also a lower entrance through a tube on the canyon floor level. All these entrances make Badlands pure hades for defensive players.
The inside of each base is equally full of holes. There are no less than FIVE ways into the enemy base if you count weapon jumping up onto the main sniper deck. That is quite a lot of area for the defense to cover considering most other maps have only one or two ways to get into an enemy base. As such - smart defensive players will center thier D around the flag itself - not the entrances. Here's a sneaky-peeky at the insides...
 
I hope that gave you at least a vague notion of what this map is all about. Badlands is a very fun map that requires good teamwork. Defense must work together to defend the flag or slippery light Offense players will be making off with the flag like it is a Frenchman's loose daughter. Offense must work together or they are going to spend 30 minutes doing nothing but running to the enemy base from thier respawn (and getting slaughtered every once in a while).
THE SERVER: PFEFFER LAND (IP 209.20.148.201:27015)
THE TIME: 8:56 p.m. Mountain Time to 9:26 p.m. JUNE 18, 2001.
THE OBSERVERS: NAFARIAS AND HIS NOBLE AIDE SLYRR!
I entered the Pfeffer Land server and pestered the good folks in clan Pfeffer to accomodate my battlereporting needs. The admin was kind enough to allow it - even though I had to wait through two other rounds of the game until Badlands cycled in. They restarted the server. Oddly, this had the stupid effect of BOOTING everyone on the server just as the round began. I had to spend about 14 seconds madly scrambling to re-enter, during which time team RED capped the flag once! Dishonor on the family of the Pfeffer server for goofy behavior... Slops to *KaOs* for a bogus indefensible capture. That happens on the pubs quite a bit though - so what are you going to do?
The opening defensive setups were as follows... This is sorta like 'build orders' in RTS games - it sets the tone for the game that is going to follow. Will be be an efficient "8 pylon 2 gate goon rush" build or a Big Game Hunters "no rush for 20 minutes!" build?
Well - team BLUE certainly isn't going to win any awards for 'best opening setup' this round. They had NO one guarding the flag, and only one player was on Defense at all - a lone sniper on the main sniper deck by the name of RJMasters. But one sniper doth not a defense make in Badlands...
Team RED on the other hand was definitely arming for bear at home base. They had an engy at the bottom of the flag turret and a soldier up top. This is a good basic D setup that will stop most 'lone ranger' offense attempts and even some coordinated attacks if the D is competent. Looking good so far!
The result of Blue's questionable setup is that they are essentially WIDE open to anybody waltzing in and taking thier flag. Once the flag has left the base in Badlands you have essentially lost any chance of preventing a capture. Game over man. Therefore you must expend every defensive effort you can to keep the flag inside your base. Who has a better chance of that right now?
*KaOs* - our rude sniper - was red's point offense for the first 4 or 5 minutes of the match. After his bogus first cap, he went back to perform a little offensive sniping (see picture 1). After waiting around for a minute or two and seeing no targets, he decides he may as well look and see what he can 'get away' with. He (of course) finds the flag undefended and gets the flag all the way back to his base before a single Blue player even saw him. LPG-Hunter nails him with a sniper shot (irony). But it doesn't take long for *KaOs* to come back for the capture. SCORE: RED=20 and BLUE=0.
BLUE has no defense except a sniper for a minute or two right? So you would expect them to be all offense, eh? Well - you are right! If RED had no defense they might have been in trouble. Alas for the Blue team that the Reds were waiting to lay 20 tons of smackdown on them. First off, Jason comes waltzing in the main entrance as a HW Guy only to get cut to ribbons the second he steps towards the bottom level of the flag well by the main door. HydraSlayer dances on his corpse while Mr. Grapple and Bulletsponge come in next as a soldier and a demoman respectively. Logically since HydraSlayer's sentry has the lower entrance covered they figure the upper entrance is the best way to go. Unfortunately for them, Warped-TPF- is on soldier D up top, and along for the ride is the strategically challenged Woody who adds a dubious flavor to the defensive effort as a SPY. A spy on Defense is like building a fleet of Observers to destroy Photon Cannons. Anyway - the Blues manage to get the flag out the flag turret - but no further thanks to Warped-TPF- and HydraSlayer.
Well as you can see from the scoreboard, RED is walking away from thier opponents despite the fact that the BLUES outnumber them by two players. *KaOs* has two captures under his belt, and so far the BLUES have only put forth a weak offensive effort by attacking one at a time instead of in a group. Will this continue or will BLUE pull thier head out and realize they are humiliating themselves in this battlereport for all thier posterity to see?
The next event was another capture from our defensive soldier, Warped-TPF-. Apparently bored with defense, he strolls slowly across the map to the STILL undefended BLUE base. He captures the flag and along the way SHAMELESSLY pimps himself to me. This guy is like John McCain! Don't ever get between him and a T.V. camera or he will probably knock you down to get some air time... J/K Warped - we know he's a good guy.... (SHAMELESS!)
And he isn't DONE yet folks! In his endless quest for personal glory, Warped-TPF-goes back AGAIN for a flag cap. He goes in the lower tube, up the ladder, jumps in the flag turret, grabs the flag, rocket jumps out the turret, and heads for the sniper turret. A nice plan - easy capture... But WHAT'S THIS?!? BLUE actually has someone on DEFENSE! +CryptKicker+ is a lonely soldier on D and he heads the glory-hogging Warped-TPF- off at the pass! Warped-TPF- still makes it out the sniper deck, but expires on the dirt just outside the main entrance. Well it is outside still right? Easy cap, eh? Bzzzt! +CryptKicker+ sticks to his duty like glue and the cap remains serenely sitting on the bridge until it pops back into the turret. Cap #4 is DENIED!
But poor +CryptKicker+ has his work cut out for him. Warped-TPF-, *KaOs*, and Lord_me (a spy) have joined in an unholy alliance of Offensive power to reclaim the blue flag. Between the three of them they work together to slowly budge the flag out of the blue flag turret, out the lower entrance, and back to the Red base for cap #4. It took a bit of work, but thier coordinated efforts were too much for +CryptKicker+ to handle. +CryptKicker+ even got some dubious 'help' from dirtydawg as a Pyro. Not the best choice. Don't mistake me - I LOVE those flame-belching, chaos-creating master's of distraction as much as the next guy - but Defense is not what a Pyro was designed for. Cap#4 is a feat accomplished, and Blue still has not made a solid flag attempt yet.
The scores here say it all. Red is clobbering Blue like they are a two-bit hood on "Walker: Texas Ranger". But if you take away *KaOs*'s 30 'capture points' and Warped-TPF-'s 10 then the kill ratios for the two teams aren't all that different. Blue is evidently doing SOMETHING over there... Let's find out what!
(Sounds of scuffle on the set) Hey! What the...
"Hey kids! It's your pal Peewee Herman! I'm out of jail and I've stayed clear of those nasty theatres that got me in so much trouble before... Hah hah! As part of my community service to 'the man' I'm here to warn you against the dangers of being stupid when playing TFC. Being stupid only endangers yourself and your team. Don't waste your time being stupid or you may end up like me someday, hosting TV game shows and starring in Vampire movies. Instead of building offensive sentries, camping outside the enemy base, and other dumb things, why not hook up with some of your light offense and try to capture the flag? It's fun AND helpful. Don't say I didn't warn you! Hah hah!"
Dang it! I have GOT to get better security... Anyhoo, this picture shows just what Blue was 'up to'. Ignoring Peewee's sage advice, for ALL this time they were just goofing around outside the Red base. [MM]PROZAC was setting up offensive sentries outside Red's base despite the fact that there are so many ways OUT of the base that an offensive sentry is just this side of useless. Mr.Grapple actually got IN Red's base but was more interested in trying to shoot people with his RPG from the Red sniper deck than such useless trifles as capturing the flag. RJMasters is a HW Guy rollicking around the outer Red base and peppering offense when he can. Don't misunderstand me! Locking down an enemy in thier own base is a great way to slow them down - but on a map like Badlands it just can't be done properly. Save it for "The Well" or "Rock2"! Also, locking down an enemy is something you usually try when you are AHEAD in points...
While all this is going on, the Red Offense continues to shake its booty and manages to capture the flag one more time. *KaOs* is the guy that actually makes the cap, and Blue is now down by 50 points. But *KaOs* leaves the game... And the glory-pimp Warped-TPF- swaps over to BLUE to even the teams up. Will the presence of the fame-monger inspire Blue to better themselves to keep him from hoarding all the glory?
In all honesty Warped-TPF- is a fine fellow. I just want to have some fun at his expense. But his skill as a Medic can't be disputed as he cleanly blows past Red's defense - circumventing soldiers, engineers, and other defensive players as he slips away with the flag twice!
This brings the scores to an interesting RED: 50 BLUE: 20 level. If this keeps up, Blue just might make a match out of this... I have only vague hopes of this happening however, because the entire offensive effort is being spearheaded by only one player (Warped) and that can get shut down pretty fast when 2 or 3 people on the opposing team decide that it is time to stop a mad-capping spree. But if a couple more guys on Blue pull thier heads out and lend a hand then the Blues may tie this game up yet!
Warped-TPF- put up a valiant effort after his first two captures, and he had some sporadic assistance from his teammates. But it was all for naught because the Reds realized Warped-TPF- wasn't just there for the glory - he was there for the win. Red tightened down on its defense and locked thier flag up pretty tight. They set up a pretty solid defense with a HW Guy at the top of the flag turret, the everpresent HydraSlayer on engy D at the turret exit, and a medic roving around between them. With this setup they were able to hold off Blue quite handily. Warped-TPF- did manage to overcome the D and cap the flag one more time with a little help from dirtydawg and Mr.Grapple. But thier assistance was almost an almost accidental 'right place - right time' thing. The clock was running out, and even though Blue outnumbered Red by 2 players at this point it is still looking pretty grim because even Warped-TPF- can't get his team to play as a TEAM.
But in the end, it is just too late in the match for a comeback. Especially since Red's offense must have ripped the "Q" section out of thier dictionary - because they don't know the meaning of the word QUIT. Blue has finally scraped together something that vaguely resembles a defense. RJMasters has gone engy and set up on the lower exit of the flag turret. A soldier is prowling around the upper flag turret, and dirtydawg lends a flamethrower on occasion as roving offense/defense.
As the clock runs out, Lord_me, [Pfeffer]Rooster, and [sofa_kingdom] make an offensive push that gets the flag all the way to the canyon floor. dirtydawg convinces [sofa_kingdom] to drop the flag, and the match ends there. The score...?
BLUE: 30
RED: 50
WINNER = RED!
CONCLUSIONS:
This match is a classic example of how on a public server you have to discipline yourself to fulfill the 'role' your team needs. Blue had no defense in the early game and it killed them. No one on Blue (until it was way too late) decided to fill the 'role' of flag defense. As such, Red captured the flag at least two times more than they should have. Defense DEFENSE DEFENSE!! people! If you don't have one - GET one!
Also illustrated in this match is the value of a good, coordinated effort with your team. A 'lone ranger' can take you only so far (you listening Warped-TPF-... :) ). Badlands is a map where lack of coordination aggravates your team's performance if you aren't doing it. Poorly coordinated offense gives you no captures. Red wasn't exactly playing at CLAN level performance, but they were a durn sight better at working together compared to the Blue team.
Lastly, Blue's early performance shows that you shouldn't screw around on the pubs. Your team is counting on you, and goofing off with silly stunts during a match is just lacks class. It is a game - we all know that - but it is a TEAM game and one loose screw can cause your whole machine to fall apart. You don't have to be Joe Serious, but at least TRY to think of your team...
BONUS PICTURE!
Hey hey! A HW Guy by the name of (1)Player is someplace really REALLY wierd right now. I'm not saying where - but the person that emails me and guesses the CORRECT location of (1)Player and tells us HOW he got there gets to choose the map for my next Battlereport! That's right folks! Email me at phyrexia88@hotmail.com with your guesses and see if you win!
 
THIS HAS BEEN A NAFARIAS SEZ! WARPED-TPF- PRODUCTION!
(Dang you WARPED!!!!) :)
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